Having a chronic condition can get exhausting. It can dominate every thought and action. It can make you angry as Hell itself! It can even cause a sense of self pity if you let your negative thoughts ruminate too long. Some days can be just too hard to deal with. Sometimes that inner strength feels completely sapped. You can feel helpless, worthless, guilty and on occasion hopeless. You feel judged because so much is expected, yet you feel you just can't deliver.
I have gone through this "stage" of chronic illness numerous times throughout my life. It can stick around as little as a day, or as long as a couple of weeks. Plain and simple "It SUCKS". However, I have come to realize that it's all part of the growing process. It actually helps you learn to cope. It gives you stamina for the days ahead. Sounds a bit crazy doesn't it? Well, it's really not. There is a scripture that reads "all things work together for good..." Even those horribly bad moments in our life have a wonderful purpose. They mold and shape us into better and stronger people IF we allow it.
I find that when I'm going through those very hard moments in life it's so incredibly helpful to talk to someone. It can be a close understanding friend or extended family member, a counselor or support group member. If you don't have someone in your life who will listen without judgement, then SEEK someone out! You owe that to yourself. My confidant is my childhood friend Mimi. She has MS. We are always there for each other. We listen when the other is weak. We rarely give advice unless it's absolutely necessary. We just offer an ear and open heart. And we pray for one another. I feel it's healthy to have someone on the outside. The home can be stressful as it is and a family member such as a spouse or child may not be the wisest choice. If you are confined to your house and don't have anyone to talk to, seek out a support group on-line. There are so many options out there. I have benefited from this type of support many many times throughout my life.
I hope and pray that you find that special someone. It's imperative to have a friend to lean on and help you get through those very tough times. And when you are feeling stronger, you in turn can return the support.
